Boston.

I bought a chair yesterday for my apartment when I move to Boston. 

I'm not going to get depressed anymore. 

In a year I wont live here and none of this will matter. 

banwagon.

I jumped the single banwagon pretty fast, forgetting that you loose half your friends with the guy.

Thursday night...sitting home alone while my roomates are at rehearsal drinking beer and reading I know why the caged bird sings. I keep telling myself that when I move to major city things will change. I will be the crazy girl with countless friends that I've always wanted.


We'll see.

Why I am a bad person. Chapter One.

I dont think I will ever get married. I dont think I am capable of staying truthful or just staying in general with someone for a more then 2 years.

Maybe its my "daddy issues". Maybe its my mother's oppression. Maybe I'm to much of an independent person. Maybe I'm still a child.

Being in my room with all of Paul's things was suffocating. I want fresh exciting new love. He was always the instigator and the time I spent with him introduced to a whole new "popular" world I was never accepted into. I lived in his shadow. Maybe that was just a phase. I'm not even sure how happy I was.

Now that he needs me as a crutch I cant do it. I tried all break but I cant. get over it! honestly! sorry mr popular doesnt have any friends anymore and works all the time. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD! He has turned into such a dull person. Maybe a selfish bitch but I cant fix you.

If I cant handle this stupid relationship then how am I going to be able to handle marriage. For better or worse?

get it girl.

I'm going to work out at least five days a week.
I'm going to loose 20 pounds.
I'm going to eat healthier.
I'm going to feel better about myself.

It's not a diet, it's a lifestyle change.

love like the movies

I have the guy....I just wish I could be the girl.

seriously...

I am cute. I am funny. I am fashionable. I am smart.

And if someone doesn't give me the time of day soon I'm going to fucking freak out.